Why you should choose Harambe Ibogaine Detox Centre?
I fully recommend the ibogaine experience with Bilal and Cathy. I had a preconception that they might be two crazy hippies who would encourage me to talk to trees and denounce myself as an animal murderer, but they are just two lovely, knowledgeable and down-to-earth people. As soon as I arrived and got chatting to them and their kids, I felt relaxed and I really enjoyed getting to know the whole family over the course of five days. They also have the loveliest and most well-trained (Ridgeback) dog: Jamma.
They live in a beautiful part of the world and after I recovered from the Ibogaine experience, I spent my time either lying in a hammock in their botanical conservatory, sunbathing on the roof or walking with the dog through the orange groves and eating delicious oranges. By the end of my stay, I felt fully recharged and ready to face the world again.
I fully recommend Cathy, Bilal and this setting over staying in a clinic. They have all the relevant knowledge to ensure you have the experience you need, and probably twice the compassion (compared to clinic doctors).
How was my ibogaine experience?
Cathy picked me up from the airport and took me to their house; when I arrived, Bilal gave me a drink which cleared out my system. Then I just relaxed on my bed and watched films on my laptop and went to sleep. The next morning Bilal gave me the first ibogaine capsule, then another an hour later but nothing was happening. However, I lay there a little longer and I started to enjoy the shard of light coming through the blind turning into a hallucination of a beach. This was just the beginning. Throughout the following few hours as things got more intense, Bilal and Cathy both made regular checks on me without disturbing me (which was perfect). The whole time I was also fully aware of who I was and where I was; I even tried to test myself with thinking of scary stuff and it was fine because I knew that I was in control. As others have said, you do get more sensitive to noise. I would recommend bringing ear plugs because you are in a house and there naturally will be some noise, but for me it wasn’t really a bother.
I cannot really recall any of the visions I had. They were not linked in any emotionally relevant way to me, nor did they show me anything revelatory. However, I was able to think deeply about who I was as a person, the things I said to people and why I said them. It was like, for the first time, I was able to think without all the other opinions and influences from outside casting doubt on the truthfulness of my thoughts and beliefs. I discovered some stuff that really struck on a visceral level, and this was stuff I had already known on an intellectual level but it had never penetrated to motivate active change.
This stuff was mainly my need for attention and focus on myself. I kept remembering snippets of conversations I had had over the past few months and all of them were showing me that the stuff I was saying was designed to draw attention to me (both positive and negative), and the focus was always on how I was presenting myself to the world. The ibogaine also revealed a false self I had developed to mask a fragile ego. This false self was opinionated, controversial and somewhat obnoxious.
After a few hours, the ibogaine began to subside in strength. This is the hardest part because you lay there with your thoughts for the next 24-48 hours and it is really really boring. However, it is vital because you can still think in a creative way and it helps cement and clarify new insights. The next morning after the experience, Bilal brought me fruit, granola and yoghurt (after no food for about 40 hours). I was sooo happy and I definitely felt Stockholm syndrome towards him J.
How do I feel now (3 weeks later)?
In some ways I am not much different. My personality has not changed drastically. I still drink more than I should and I love meat just as much as before. However, I feel like I scraped out a negative and false feeling inside myself. I feel calmer and more compassionate towards my friends and family, and I also feel this more towards myself. I can see aspects of myself that I really like more clearly and I feel less attached and ashamed of my negative traits. It’s like I’ve detached the negative traits from my identity and now they just live in my mind, ready to be slowly destroyed (no rush). Finally, I feel motivated to make active changes towards self-improvement in the form of therapy.
Final advice?
Don’t be afraid to undertake this experience. It will give you what you need.
